This week, a predator broke into my chicken coop, digging under the wire I buried, and killed my girls. I came here to write about it but then I realized that I had nothing left to say. I’m out of words.

// 

I realized recently that this space has become the place where I come to write through what’s on my mind. I’ve always been the kind of person who lives in their own head, and when I’m upset about something or working through something it’s easiest for me to process if I mentally write it out in a monologue. Taking that one step further, writing it out helps me clear my mind, to line my thoughts up and see them more clearly. 

Sometimes, that means working through world issues that are weighing on me. Sometimes that means dealing with my own personal issues, like infertility. Sometimes that means dealing with the untimely death of animals I’ve raised since their first day on this Earth. 

//

The nice thing about this tumblr is that I feel like I’m writing into the ether. I don’t read the statistics so it feels like nobody is reading. It feels like something between my livejournal of yesteryear and a written journal. So, thank you missELENAeous, for letting me write into the void, for allowing me to write my way through my brain. I’m a saner person because of this space. 

We are the owners of an aggressive dog. 

Somehow, by forces outside of our control and despite our best efforts, Kaylee battles with fear based aggression that is unpredictable and scary. Our sweet girl is also kind of an asshole. 

Here’s how it has been. With us, she’s a dream. She’s submissive, loving, snuggly, and kind. She follows instructions perfectly, even if she doesn’t necessarily want to (like when you tell her to drop the butter wrapper). She couldn’t be sweeter. Most of the time, when we have friends and family over, she’s fine. She hides sometimes, and occasionally she’ll growl or bark. When that happens, we put her in her own space. 

This Spring, while we were in San Francisco, she nipped someone. She was staying with a friend and a maintenance guy came in to fix something. She waited until she wasn’t looking and nipped his ankle. We responded by immediately enrolling her in a dog training program. It was amazing, she came so far. We thought she was over the hump. 

This weekend, we were out of town for a wedding. We had a neighbor watching them, a woman who owns a pet sitting service. We warned her that Kaylee had a history with aggression, that she shouldn’t turn her back on her, and armed her with a lot of treats. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough. Our dog sitter didn’t see her coming up from behind and Kaylee bit her ankle. Thankfully, the dog sitter is fine (and still willing to come back later this month), but Dan and I are shell shocked. 

Our best reasoning is that Kaylee, who has always been an incredibly anxious dog, was super on edge because we were not there. She’s only spent one other weekend on her own during the nights, and that was over a year ago. Combine that change of routine and our absence with the fact that there were heavy storms all weekend, and I think she was just a wreck. That doesn’t excuse her actions- far from it- but in my effort to understand her motives that’s what I can come up with. She was on edge, there was a relative stranger in the house, she lashed out. 

Unfortunately this fall is full of travel that we can’t beg out of and we can’t bring the dogs on, so I am forced to research and brace myself for a repeat of this in a few weeks. After reading about Thundershirts and anxiety this evening I ordered her one, which I am hopeful will work. I also ordered her some homeopathic dog treats that are meant to calm. Will it be enough? I have no idea. 

More than anything, I feel like I failed. Kaylee has become increasingly anxious in her adulthood, but we had taken steps with the trainer that seemed to be working. I learned the hard way this weekend that she is far from “cured” and that there is work to be done, always. She is such a sweet and wonderful dog, and I wish everyone could see the side of her that I see. She has come so far, she even kind of likes my dad now, but this is a good reminder that she has far to go. 

I would love help, from you, if you can offer it. Do you have any experiences with fear based aggression? Any tricks or tips? I’m open to every idea.

I am taking it really incredibly easy this weekend because we are home for the first time in forever and I have no super urgent work to do (just kidding, Bob, I promise I’m working on those book edits). I’m plugging away at some cookbook projects and tomorrow I’ll be making some videos for a new partnership (good thing I went out and got a sunburn today), but today and yesterday I mostly just hung out at the beach, soaking up the sun and the ocean and the summer. It has been everything I needed and more. 
Some highlights & whatnot from the past few weeks:
- I had my 10 year high school reunion! It was awkward. And then we drank more, and it was less awkward. I didn’t really realize how awkward a person I am until that moment. Being with people who knew you when you were a teen makes you feel like a teen again, huh?
- Beach, beach, beach, beach, beach, marsh. The Dream. 
- Dan had a massive allergic reaction to a cat (not his first, but the worst yet) so I was up until 3am on Friday making sure he didn’t die. He didn’t, thanks Benadryl for the help. Now I need to start pressuring him to go to an allergy specialist. 
- I was lucky enough to add a pair of tieks to my wardrobe this weekend and now I think I have a new favorite shoe (close your ears, birks). They are like perfect little clouds for your feet. 
- Our house is really coming together, and I’m loving it. I’ll do a little home tour soon once we get a few things set into place, but it’s 95% there and it feels so good. 
- I didn’t realize you were supposed to have chickens in your kitchen (for luck? Maybe?) but now that I know it’s important I have some chicken prints. I’m not one to mess with good fortune. 
- I say this all the time but we are so rich in friends and community in Wilmington. This weekend has been so full of time spent with amazing and kind and inspirational people. We are so lucky. It almost makes me want to say #soblessed. But I won’t. 
- Wilmington Brewing Co, the best. Forever. 
And that is it. Go forth, eat a po’ boy. Float in the waves. Enjoy the summer breeze.  I am taking it really incredibly easy this weekend because we are home for the first time in forever and I have no super urgent work to do (just kidding, Bob, I promise I’m working on those book edits). I’m plugging away at some cookbook projects and tomorrow I’ll be making some videos for a new partnership (good thing I went out and got a sunburn today), but today and yesterday I mostly just hung out at the beach, soaking up the sun and the ocean and the summer. It has been everything I needed and more. 
Some highlights & whatnot from the past few weeks:
- I had my 10 year high school reunion! It was awkward. And then we drank more, and it was less awkward. I didn’t really realize how awkward a person I am until that moment. Being with people who knew you when you were a teen makes you feel like a teen again, huh?
- Beach, beach, beach, beach, beach, marsh. The Dream. 
- Dan had a massive allergic reaction to a cat (not his first, but the worst yet) so I was up until 3am on Friday making sure he didn’t die. He didn’t, thanks Benadryl for the help. Now I need to start pressuring him to go to an allergy specialist. 
- I was lucky enough to add a pair of tieks to my wardrobe this weekend and now I think I have a new favorite shoe (close your ears, birks). They are like perfect little clouds for your feet. 
- Our house is really coming together, and I’m loving it. I’ll do a little home tour soon once we get a few things set into place, but it’s 95% there and it feels so good. 
- I didn’t realize you were supposed to have chickens in your kitchen (for luck? Maybe?) but now that I know it’s important I have some chicken prints. I’m not one to mess with good fortune. 
- I say this all the time but we are so rich in friends and community in Wilmington. This weekend has been so full of time spent with amazing and kind and inspirational people. We are so lucky. It almost makes me want to say #soblessed. But I won’t. 
- Wilmington Brewing Co, the best. Forever. 
And that is it. Go forth, eat a po’ boy. Float in the waves. Enjoy the summer breeze.  I am taking it really incredibly easy this weekend because we are home for the first time in forever and I have no super urgent work to do (just kidding, Bob, I promise I’m working on those book edits). I’m plugging away at some cookbook projects and tomorrow I’ll be making some videos for a new partnership (good thing I went out and got a sunburn today), but today and yesterday I mostly just hung out at the beach, soaking up the sun and the ocean and the summer. It has been everything I needed and more. 
Some highlights & whatnot from the past few weeks:
- I had my 10 year high school reunion! It was awkward. And then we drank more, and it was less awkward. I didn’t really realize how awkward a person I am until that moment. Being with people who knew you when you were a teen makes you feel like a teen again, huh?
- Beach, beach, beach, beach, beach, marsh. The Dream. 
- Dan had a massive allergic reaction to a cat (not his first, but the worst yet) so I was up until 3am on Friday making sure he didn’t die. He didn’t, thanks Benadryl for the help. Now I need to start pressuring him to go to an allergy specialist. 
- I was lucky enough to add a pair of tieks to my wardrobe this weekend and now I think I have a new favorite shoe (close your ears, birks). They are like perfect little clouds for your feet. 
- Our house is really coming together, and I’m loving it. I’ll do a little home tour soon once we get a few things set into place, but it’s 95% there and it feels so good. 
- I didn’t realize you were supposed to have chickens in your kitchen (for luck? Maybe?) but now that I know it’s important I have some chicken prints. I’m not one to mess with good fortune. 
- I say this all the time but we are so rich in friends and community in Wilmington. This weekend has been so full of time spent with amazing and kind and inspirational people. We are so lucky. It almost makes me want to say #soblessed. But I won’t. 
- Wilmington Brewing Co, the best. Forever. 
And that is it. Go forth, eat a po’ boy. Float in the waves. Enjoy the summer breeze.  I am taking it really incredibly easy this weekend because we are home for the first time in forever and I have no super urgent work to do (just kidding, Bob, I promise I’m working on those book edits). I’m plugging away at some cookbook projects and tomorrow I’ll be making some videos for a new partnership (good thing I went out and got a sunburn today), but today and yesterday I mostly just hung out at the beach, soaking up the sun and the ocean and the summer. It has been everything I needed and more. 
Some highlights & whatnot from the past few weeks:
- I had my 10 year high school reunion! It was awkward. And then we drank more, and it was less awkward. I didn’t really realize how awkward a person I am until that moment. Being with people who knew you when you were a teen makes you feel like a teen again, huh?
- Beach, beach, beach, beach, beach, marsh. The Dream. 
- Dan had a massive allergic reaction to a cat (not his first, but the worst yet) so I was up until 3am on Friday making sure he didn’t die. He didn’t, thanks Benadryl for the help. Now I need to start pressuring him to go to an allergy specialist. 
- I was lucky enough to add a pair of tieks to my wardrobe this weekend and now I think I have a new favorite shoe (close your ears, birks). They are like perfect little clouds for your feet. 
- Our house is really coming together, and I’m loving it. I’ll do a little home tour soon once we get a few things set into place, but it’s 95% there and it feels so good. 
- I didn’t realize you were supposed to have chickens in your kitchen (for luck? Maybe?) but now that I know it’s important I have some chicken prints. I’m not one to mess with good fortune. 
- I say this all the time but we are so rich in friends and community in Wilmington. This weekend has been so full of time spent with amazing and kind and inspirational people. We are so lucky. It almost makes me want to say #soblessed. But I won’t. 
- Wilmington Brewing Co, the best. Forever. 
And that is it. Go forth, eat a po’ boy. Float in the waves. Enjoy the summer breeze.  I am taking it really incredibly easy this weekend because we are home for the first time in forever and I have no super urgent work to do (just kidding, Bob, I promise I’m working on those book edits). I’m plugging away at some cookbook projects and tomorrow I’ll be making some videos for a new partnership (good thing I went out and got a sunburn today), but today and yesterday I mostly just hung out at the beach, soaking up the sun and the ocean and the summer. It has been everything I needed and more. 
Some highlights & whatnot from the past few weeks:
- I had my 10 year high school reunion! It was awkward. And then we drank more, and it was less awkward. I didn’t really realize how awkward a person I am until that moment. Being with people who knew you when you were a teen makes you feel like a teen again, huh?
- Beach, beach, beach, beach, beach, marsh. The Dream. 
- Dan had a massive allergic reaction to a cat (not his first, but the worst yet) so I was up until 3am on Friday making sure he didn’t die. He didn’t, thanks Benadryl for the help. Now I need to start pressuring him to go to an allergy specialist. 
- I was lucky enough to add a pair of tieks to my wardrobe this weekend and now I think I have a new favorite shoe (close your ears, birks). They are like perfect little clouds for your feet. 
- Our house is really coming together, and I’m loving it. I’ll do a little home tour soon once we get a few things set into place, but it’s 95% there and it feels so good. 
- I didn’t realize you were supposed to have chickens in your kitchen (for luck? Maybe?) but now that I know it’s important I have some chicken prints. I’m not one to mess with good fortune. 
- I say this all the time but we are so rich in friends and community in Wilmington. This weekend has been so full of time spent with amazing and kind and inspirational people. We are so lucky. It almost makes me want to say #soblessed. But I won’t. 
- Wilmington Brewing Co, the best. Forever. 
And that is it. Go forth, eat a po’ boy. Float in the waves. Enjoy the summer breeze.  I am taking it really incredibly easy this weekend because we are home for the first time in forever and I have no super urgent work to do (just kidding, Bob, I promise I’m working on those book edits). I’m plugging away at some cookbook projects and tomorrow I’ll be making some videos for a new partnership (good thing I went out and got a sunburn today), but today and yesterday I mostly just hung out at the beach, soaking up the sun and the ocean and the summer. It has been everything I needed and more. 
Some highlights & whatnot from the past few weeks:
- I had my 10 year high school reunion! It was awkward. And then we drank more, and it was less awkward. I didn’t really realize how awkward a person I am until that moment. Being with people who knew you when you were a teen makes you feel like a teen again, huh?
- Beach, beach, beach, beach, beach, marsh. The Dream. 
- Dan had a massive allergic reaction to a cat (not his first, but the worst yet) so I was up until 3am on Friday making sure he didn’t die. He didn’t, thanks Benadryl for the help. Now I need to start pressuring him to go to an allergy specialist. 
- I was lucky enough to add a pair of tieks to my wardrobe this weekend and now I think I have a new favorite shoe (close your ears, birks). They are like perfect little clouds for your feet. 
- Our house is really coming together, and I’m loving it. I’ll do a little home tour soon once we get a few things set into place, but it’s 95% there and it feels so good. 
- I didn’t realize you were supposed to have chickens in your kitchen (for luck? Maybe?) but now that I know it’s important I have some chicken prints. I’m not one to mess with good fortune. 
- I say this all the time but we are so rich in friends and community in Wilmington. This weekend has been so full of time spent with amazing and kind and inspirational people. We are so lucky. It almost makes me want to say #soblessed. But I won’t. 
- Wilmington Brewing Co, the best. Forever. 
And that is it. Go forth, eat a po’ boy. Float in the waves. Enjoy the summer breeze.  I am taking it really incredibly easy this weekend because we are home for the first time in forever and I have no super urgent work to do (just kidding, Bob, I promise I’m working on those book edits). I’m plugging away at some cookbook projects and tomorrow I’ll be making some videos for a new partnership (good thing I went out and got a sunburn today), but today and yesterday I mostly just hung out at the beach, soaking up the sun and the ocean and the summer. It has been everything I needed and more. 
Some highlights & whatnot from the past few weeks:
- I had my 10 year high school reunion! It was awkward. And then we drank more, and it was less awkward. I didn’t really realize how awkward a person I am until that moment. Being with people who knew you when you were a teen makes you feel like a teen again, huh?
- Beach, beach, beach, beach, beach, marsh. The Dream. 
- Dan had a massive allergic reaction to a cat (not his first, but the worst yet) so I was up until 3am on Friday making sure he didn’t die. He didn’t, thanks Benadryl for the help. Now I need to start pressuring him to go to an allergy specialist. 
- I was lucky enough to add a pair of tieks to my wardrobe this weekend and now I think I have a new favorite shoe (close your ears, birks). They are like perfect little clouds for your feet. 
- Our house is really coming together, and I’m loving it. I’ll do a little home tour soon once we get a few things set into place, but it’s 95% there and it feels so good. 
- I didn’t realize you were supposed to have chickens in your kitchen (for luck? Maybe?) but now that I know it’s important I have some chicken prints. I’m not one to mess with good fortune. 
- I say this all the time but we are so rich in friends and community in Wilmington. This weekend has been so full of time spent with amazing and kind and inspirational people. We are so lucky. It almost makes me want to say #soblessed. But I won’t. 
- Wilmington Brewing Co, the best. Forever. 
And that is it. Go forth, eat a po’ boy. Float in the waves. Enjoy the summer breeze.  I am taking it really incredibly easy this weekend because we are home for the first time in forever and I have no super urgent work to do (just kidding, Bob, I promise I’m working on those book edits). I’m plugging away at some cookbook projects and tomorrow I’ll be making some videos for a new partnership (good thing I went out and got a sunburn today), but today and yesterday I mostly just hung out at the beach, soaking up the sun and the ocean and the summer. It has been everything I needed and more. 
Some highlights & whatnot from the past few weeks:
- I had my 10 year high school reunion! It was awkward. And then we drank more, and it was less awkward. I didn’t really realize how awkward a person I am until that moment. Being with people who knew you when you were a teen makes you feel like a teen again, huh?
- Beach, beach, beach, beach, beach, marsh. The Dream. 
- Dan had a massive allergic reaction to a cat (not his first, but the worst yet) so I was up until 3am on Friday making sure he didn’t die. He didn’t, thanks Benadryl for the help. Now I need to start pressuring him to go to an allergy specialist. 
- I was lucky enough to add a pair of tieks to my wardrobe this weekend and now I think I have a new favorite shoe (close your ears, birks). They are like perfect little clouds for your feet. 
- Our house is really coming together, and I’m loving it. I’ll do a little home tour soon once we get a few things set into place, but it’s 95% there and it feels so good. 
- I didn’t realize you were supposed to have chickens in your kitchen (for luck? Maybe?) but now that I know it’s important I have some chicken prints. I’m not one to mess with good fortune. 
- I say this all the time but we are so rich in friends and community in Wilmington. This weekend has been so full of time spent with amazing and kind and inspirational people. We are so lucky. It almost makes me want to say #soblessed. But I won’t. 
- Wilmington Brewing Co, the best. Forever. 
And that is it. Go forth, eat a po’ boy. Float in the waves. Enjoy the summer breeze.  I am taking it really incredibly easy this weekend because we are home for the first time in forever and I have no super urgent work to do (just kidding, Bob, I promise I’m working on those book edits). I’m plugging away at some cookbook projects and tomorrow I’ll be making some videos for a new partnership (good thing I went out and got a sunburn today), but today and yesterday I mostly just hung out at the beach, soaking up the sun and the ocean and the summer. It has been everything I needed and more. 
Some highlights & whatnot from the past few weeks:
- I had my 10 year high school reunion! It was awkward. And then we drank more, and it was less awkward. I didn’t really realize how awkward a person I am until that moment. Being with people who knew you when you were a teen makes you feel like a teen again, huh?
- Beach, beach, beach, beach, beach, marsh. The Dream. 
- Dan had a massive allergic reaction to a cat (not his first, but the worst yet) so I was up until 3am on Friday making sure he didn’t die. He didn’t, thanks Benadryl for the help. Now I need to start pressuring him to go to an allergy specialist. 
- I was lucky enough to add a pair of tieks to my wardrobe this weekend and now I think I have a new favorite shoe (close your ears, birks). They are like perfect little clouds for your feet. 
- Our house is really coming together, and I’m loving it. I’ll do a little home tour soon once we get a few things set into place, but it’s 95% there and it feels so good. 
- I didn’t realize you were supposed to have chickens in your kitchen (for luck? Maybe?) but now that I know it’s important I have some chicken prints. I’m not one to mess with good fortune. 
- I say this all the time but we are so rich in friends and community in Wilmington. This weekend has been so full of time spent with amazing and kind and inspirational people. We are so lucky. It almost makes me want to say #soblessed. But I won’t. 
- Wilmington Brewing Co, the best. Forever. 
And that is it. Go forth, eat a po’ boy. Float in the waves. Enjoy the summer breeze.  I am taking it really incredibly easy this weekend because we are home for the first time in forever and I have no super urgent work to do (just kidding, Bob, I promise I’m working on those book edits). I’m plugging away at some cookbook projects and tomorrow I’ll be making some videos for a new partnership (good thing I went out and got a sunburn today), but today and yesterday I mostly just hung out at the beach, soaking up the sun and the ocean and the summer. It has been everything I needed and more. 
Some highlights & whatnot from the past few weeks:
- I had my 10 year high school reunion! It was awkward. And then we drank more, and it was less awkward. I didn’t really realize how awkward a person I am until that moment. Being with people who knew you when you were a teen makes you feel like a teen again, huh?
- Beach, beach, beach, beach, beach, marsh. The Dream. 
- Dan had a massive allergic reaction to a cat (not his first, but the worst yet) so I was up until 3am on Friday making sure he didn’t die. He didn’t, thanks Benadryl for the help. Now I need to start pressuring him to go to an allergy specialist. 
- I was lucky enough to add a pair of tieks to my wardrobe this weekend and now I think I have a new favorite shoe (close your ears, birks). They are like perfect little clouds for your feet. 
- Our house is really coming together, and I’m loving it. I’ll do a little home tour soon once we get a few things set into place, but it’s 95% there and it feels so good. 
- I didn’t realize you were supposed to have chickens in your kitchen (for luck? Maybe?) but now that I know it’s important I have some chicken prints. I’m not one to mess with good fortune. 
- I say this all the time but we are so rich in friends and community in Wilmington. This weekend has been so full of time spent with amazing and kind and inspirational people. We are so lucky. It almost makes me want to say #soblessed. But I won’t. 
- Wilmington Brewing Co, the best. Forever. 
And that is it. Go forth, eat a po’ boy. Float in the waves. Enjoy the summer breeze. 

I am taking it really incredibly easy this weekend because we are home for the first time in forever and I have no super urgent work to do (just kidding, Bob, I promise I’m working on those book edits). I’m plugging away at some cookbook projects and tomorrow I’ll be making some videos for a new partnership (good thing I went out and got a sunburn today), but today and yesterday I mostly just hung out at the beach, soaking up the sun and the ocean and the summer. It has been everything I needed and more. 

Some highlights & whatnot from the past few weeks:

- I had my 10 year high school reunion! It was awkward. And then we drank more, and it was less awkward. I didn’t really realize how awkward a person I am until that moment. Being with people who knew you when you were a teen makes you feel like a teen again, huh?

- Beach, beach, beach, beach, beach, marsh. The Dream. 

- Dan had a massive allergic reaction to a cat (not his first, but the worst yet) so I was up until 3am on Friday making sure he didn’t die. He didn’t, thanks Benadryl for the help. Now I need to start pressuring him to go to an allergy specialist. 

- I was lucky enough to add a pair of tieks to my wardrobe this weekend and now I think I have a new favorite shoe (close your ears, birks). They are like perfect little clouds for your feet. 

- Our house is really coming together, and I’m loving it. I’ll do a little home tour soon once we get a few things set into place, but it’s 95% there and it feels so good. 

- I didn’t realize you were supposed to have chickens in your kitchen (for luck? Maybe?) but now that I know it’s important I have some chicken prints. I’m not one to mess with good fortune. 

- I say this all the time but we are so rich in friends and community in Wilmington. This weekend has been so full of time spent with amazing and kind and inspirational people. We are so lucky. It almost makes me want to say #soblessed. But I won’t. 

- Wilmington Brewing Co, the best. Forever. 

And that is it. Go forth, eat a po’ boy. Float in the waves. Enjoy the summer breeze. 

So I’m back on the horse— the marathon running horse! After taking that doctor recommended break (that ended up doing nothing but making me depressed) and searching for the right race I settled on the Kiawah marathon this December and jumped on in. 
I’m working through the Hal Higdon intermediate marathon course. I’m trying to add in some speed work to help with my slow-pokedness, but right now I’m just trying to get my body used to running a lot again. It’s been a while since I was consistent, and I’ve found that I’m 100% better when I have a plan. In essence, if I’m not training, I’m not doing it. So, I’ll train!
I have been battling some calf related pain for the past month, something I think is related to a tight IT band. We haven’t been as consistent with our yoga the past few months as we should have been due to an incredibly busy schedule, but I’m trying to get better about doing daily hip openers and gentle stretches at home. I also ordered a heavy duty foam roller (mine is not cutting it) that should be here next week, so we’ll see. 
All in all, I’m excited to be working towards something. I also started vitex, a homeopathic option for regulating my hormones/cycles, two months ago and have seen a huge improvement in my day-to-day life. Not only did I have my first non-medicated 30 day cycle ever, but I have felt pretty good. Which is amazing considering I’ve spent the better part of the past two years nauseated and feeling like shit. It’s weird (and awesome) to feel… normal. Is this normal? I’m not familiar. 
So, yeah. Race plan, check. Training, check. Whole body health, check.  So I’m back on the horse— the marathon running horse! After taking that doctor recommended break (that ended up doing nothing but making me depressed) and searching for the right race I settled on the Kiawah marathon this December and jumped on in. 
I’m working through the Hal Higdon intermediate marathon course. I’m trying to add in some speed work to help with my slow-pokedness, but right now I’m just trying to get my body used to running a lot again. It’s been a while since I was consistent, and I’ve found that I’m 100% better when I have a plan. In essence, if I’m not training, I’m not doing it. So, I’ll train!
I have been battling some calf related pain for the past month, something I think is related to a tight IT band. We haven’t been as consistent with our yoga the past few months as we should have been due to an incredibly busy schedule, but I’m trying to get better about doing daily hip openers and gentle stretches at home. I also ordered a heavy duty foam roller (mine is not cutting it) that should be here next week, so we’ll see. 
All in all, I’m excited to be working towards something. I also started vitex, a homeopathic option for regulating my hormones/cycles, two months ago and have seen a huge improvement in my day-to-day life. Not only did I have my first non-medicated 30 day cycle ever, but I have felt pretty good. Which is amazing considering I’ve spent the better part of the past two years nauseated and feeling like shit. It’s weird (and awesome) to feel… normal. Is this normal? I’m not familiar. 
So, yeah. Race plan, check. Training, check. Whole body health, check.  So I’m back on the horse— the marathon running horse! After taking that doctor recommended break (that ended up doing nothing but making me depressed) and searching for the right race I settled on the Kiawah marathon this December and jumped on in. 
I’m working through the Hal Higdon intermediate marathon course. I’m trying to add in some speed work to help with my slow-pokedness, but right now I’m just trying to get my body used to running a lot again. It’s been a while since I was consistent, and I’ve found that I’m 100% better when I have a plan. In essence, if I’m not training, I’m not doing it. So, I’ll train!
I have been battling some calf related pain for the past month, something I think is related to a tight IT band. We haven’t been as consistent with our yoga the past few months as we should have been due to an incredibly busy schedule, but I’m trying to get better about doing daily hip openers and gentle stretches at home. I also ordered a heavy duty foam roller (mine is not cutting it) that should be here next week, so we’ll see. 
All in all, I’m excited to be working towards something. I also started vitex, a homeopathic option for regulating my hormones/cycles, two months ago and have seen a huge improvement in my day-to-day life. Not only did I have my first non-medicated 30 day cycle ever, but I have felt pretty good. Which is amazing considering I’ve spent the better part of the past two years nauseated and feeling like shit. It’s weird (and awesome) to feel… normal. Is this normal? I’m not familiar. 
So, yeah. Race plan, check. Training, check. Whole body health, check. 

So I’m back on the horse— the marathon running horse! After taking that doctor recommended break (that ended up doing nothing but making me depressed) and searching for the right race I settled on the Kiawah marathon this December and jumped on in. 

I’m working through the Hal Higdon intermediate marathon course. I’m trying to add in some speed work to help with my slow-pokedness, but right now I’m just trying to get my body used to running a lot again. It’s been a while since I was consistent, and I’ve found that I’m 100% better when I have a plan. In essence, if I’m not training, I’m not doing it. So, I’ll train!

I have been battling some calf related pain for the past month, something I think is related to a tight IT band. We haven’t been as consistent with our yoga the past few months as we should have been due to an incredibly busy schedule, but I’m trying to get better about doing daily hip openers and gentle stretches at home. I also ordered a heavy duty foam roller (mine is not cutting it) that should be here next week, so we’ll see. 

All in all, I’m excited to be working towards something. I also started vitex, a homeopathic option for regulating my hormones/cycles, two months ago and have seen a huge improvement in my day-to-day life. Not only did I have my first non-medicated 30 day cycle ever, but I have felt pretty good. Which is amazing considering I’ve spent the better part of the past two years nauseated and feeling like shit. It’s weird (and awesome) to feel… normal. Is this normal? I’m not familiar. 

So, yeah. Race plan, check. Training, check. Whole body health, check. 

I don’t have anything poignant to add to what has already been said, but I did have a few thoughts. 

1. Suicide can be prevented. You are valuable. Get help

2.  I have spent much of this week thinking about how Robin Williams was the anchor role in all of my favorite movies. Childhood classics like Aladdin, Hook and Mrs. Doubtfire, of course, but also Birdcage and Dead Poets Society. And Jumanji. And FERN GULLY! How could I forget about Fern Gully? He was a light, a bright light in the lives of millions.

3. I feel more personally impacted by this death of a stranger than I thought I would. But that’s the thing about life- we cannot measure the impact that we have on other people, even (maybe especially) people we have never met. Each one of us is loved by a community, either physically in our lives and around the world. Each of us is the light in someone’s life. 

4. In your grief for this great man, do not forget to be outraged about what is happening in Ferguson. We should all grieve as much for the unarmed teenager that was murdered by police as we are for Robin Williams. 

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